Toxic Positivity

I very recently read a Washington Post article about toxic positivity in a Facebook group I am a member of. The words toxic and positivity when combined seem contradictory. However, if you were to delve into the definition, you would see that the contrast suggested by the two words is purposeful. This whole notion of toxic positivity got me thinking.  Perhaps there are some people in my life who might view me in a similar light. I have embraced the good and the bad things that have happened in my life - both on a personal and a professional level. After all, there are so many things that make up who I am and who we are as individuals.

I KNOW that bad things happen. I am not afraid to acknowledge them. I’m sure if we all take a look at our collective experiences we’ll see that we all have a story and the responses vary. However, if spouting positive euphemisms and seeing the good makes me toxic, so be it. I’ll own it with a smile. Frankly, a lot of the discourse shared in the group I referenced has been exhausting. And based on what I’ve read, some of the bitterness is coming from a place that’s more deeply rooted than the fears of a pandemic. 

During the past ten months and most recently in the past week, I’ve experienced potentially some of the most difficult things I could go through as a parent next to death. A number of family and friends have been impacted too. I’ve cried, I’ve lamented, I’ve experienced a whole gamut of emotions, and I’ve listened to more heavy metal and gangster rap than I care to discuss. I’ve also tried to still acknowledge the good in life. If that’s somehow perceived as a flaw, I’ll own it.

As author Stephen Covey wrote, “Happiness, like unhappiness, is a proactive choice.” I am as sad as hell at the moment. However, I will not unpack to reside there. I know it’s okay not to be okay. It’s all a part of the human experience. Self-care and supporting one’s mental health is as important as physical health. 

I need to continue to breathe, be supportive, and take it one day at a time.